January was a month!!!
It was a month of learning, relearning and unlearning.
A month of trying and failing countless times.
I had a lot of firsts, struggled with some new year resolutions, but I have 11 more months to get it right.
School
I started University this month. Yayyy!
My experience so far has been nothing short of draining, but I absolutely love it. I’m in a new phase of my life now.
I’m dreading the last minute – cancellation of classes but it’s a Nigerian public university, of course it’s to be expected.
One huge thing I do love about being in my university is how a majority of my friends (whom I knew prior to getting admitted) are scattered around different faculties and departments. I constantly run into them at the most random places and those short interactions somehow light up my mood for the rest of the day.
As for ‘friends’ in my faculty/level, I can say I have a few of them already. They are people I just know God sent my way and so far, we’ve been navigating this new phase together.
I’ve been wary of making friends. I put out a fictional piece about a week ago about friendship breakups and every emotion I wrote about describes how I feel.
I’m proud of myself though, because Melody in 2019 would be so eager to socialise and get a million contacts, only to never have any conversation with them other than the initial “it’s —. I took your number in class today”.
In all, these weeks in uni have pushed me wayyy out of my comfort zone and like my favourite Cleo Sol song says, things will get better….
Reading and Writing.
I read 2 books this month, which was two books short of my monthly reading goal. Honestly, I could have easily reached my goal with how long January was but laziness… I may still have to shorten the goal which the overachiever in me set. Two books a month doesn’t sound too bad, right?
I wrote a lot during the first two weeks; daily journal entries and some short stories which are still in my drafts (this needs to change, Melody). In all, I put out just two pieces on this platform and only one of them was an actual piece; the one about friendship breakups. It’s one of my favourite pieces I’ve ever written. I got a lot of reviews from people I know and even more from people I don’t know and I’m glad a huge number could relate to it.
Quite frankly, I don’t think I want to set any specific writing goal for February, but I will make a more conscious effort to write and put out things regardless of how perfect or imperfect they may seem to me.
Love Lessons.
You know how you think you’re doing so well spiritually and God shows you some things about you? He did that to me and mehnn, I didn’t like what I saw…
This month God taught me to love. He showed me how much I lacked genuine love. It’s easier to love those close to you than random strangers who just want to bring the worst out of you.
Loving is hard but He showed me I can indeed love better. He showed me how the seemingly tiny things could make the biggest difference in someone’s life. I know I still have a lot to work on in this aspect and I’m embracing it all with an open heart.
After a little reflection, these are some of the things I’ve come to realise.
- My theme for 2024 is to “do things scared” and I’m proud of myself for not letting fear dominate this month. I COOKED!
- Your loved ones are not mind readers! They won’t know how you feel if you don’t communicate it to them. With that being said, I communicated better. Most times, those difficult conversations need to be had. I chose to be more vulnerable with my loved ones and this vulnerability was reciprocated in most cases and I loved that.
- Things won’t always go as you initially planned and that’s totally okay.
- I’m barely into this adulthood thing but I wholeheartedly agree that adulthood is a scam!!! Where is all my money going???
Unlike January of 2023, I’m ending this month in good health and more financially stable (LOL). Most importantly, I’m ending the month HAPPY. Genuinely Happy.
For February, though I know I’m going to have a lot more responsibilities, I pray for the grace to give my all to the things I can control and to let go of the things I cannot change and have faith that it will all work out for good in the end. ❤️
